Spotify Wrapped has landed for 2026, and once again I am staring at my own top artists like they are evidence in a trial about my emotional state. I clearly need a hug and possibly a very long playlist of sad acoustic covers. Still, my first thought was not about my own listening habits. It was about Joel Miller's. We spend so much time debating builds, endings, and love interests that we rarely ask the truly important question: what was blasting through Arthur Morgan's earbuds when he threw another bounty hunter onto the railroad tracks? I have applied zero real science and maximum vibes to answer this, and I am ready to present four very legitimate Spotify Wrapped summaries for some of my favourite video game characters.
Joel Miller - The Last of Us
Top 5 Artists: Pearl Jam, Fleetwood Mac, The Eagles, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Kid Rock
Favourite Genre: Boomer Rock
Top Song: Go Your Own Way by Fleetwood Mac
Joel is a kind-hearted mass murderer, but he is also a curmudgeonly old boomer who loves good coffee, acoustic guitars, and the quiet confidence of a man who definitely thinks he can sing. He has the energy of a dad who says 'they do not make music like this anymore' while tuning a guitar near a window. There is a reason he kept bugging Ellie about learning to play music. He wanted her to inherit not just his survival skills, but also his taste for miserable singer-songwriter energy.
Go Your Own Way is perfect for Joel because he really did go his own way by dooming humanity and taking Ellie away from the Fireflies right before a potential cure could be developed. He took the mantra of that song to heart and refused to let anyone else tell him how to live, even if the consequences were catastrophic. The original lyrics were probably about independence and not murdering a hospital full of people, but Joel has never been one for subtlety. This banger stayed on repeat until the very end.
Tom Nook - Animal Crossing
Top 5 Artists: DMX, The Notorious B.I.G., Wu-Tang Clan, Drake, Carly Rae Jepsen
Favourite Genre: East Coast Hip Hop
Top Song: Call Me Maybe by Carly Rae Jepsen
Tom Nook is a complicated man. His music taste reflects the streets he was raised on and the hustle mentality that built his little empire. He will build you a house, give you a generous loan with no deadlines and no interest, and somehow still be framed as the villain. The man has range, and I respect it. He listens to East Coast hip hop while managing his daily spreadsheets, but he also has a soft spot for bright contemporary pop.
Call Me Maybe is not about wanting a date. What Tom Nook really wants is regular repayments and a bit of correspondence from his clients. Every day he hopes you will wander into his office with a big sack of bells, ready to hand them over and ask for yet another extension. That dream remains unfulfilled because I have not opened New Horizons in years. Sorry, Tom. The bells are not coming.
Arthur Morgan - Red Dead Redemption 2
Top 5 Artists: Daughtry, Nickelback, Riley Green, Hinder, Hannah Montana
Favourite Genre: Country Rock
Top Song: Best of Both Worlds by Hannah Montana
Arthur Morgan is a cowboy with a heart of gold and a deep fondness for country rock. He carries his feelings on his sleeve when the situation calls for it, but he is also a man raised in a changing America that he cannot help but love even as it crumbles. His playlist is inspired by the horses he rides and the soil he walks on. As long as he has a warm bath and a welcome embrace at the end of the day, he can hang up his hat.
Best of Both Worlds might look like a joke, but it fits Arthur strangely well. He spends the whole game living a double life: the loyal enforcer and the man who quietly wonders if he can be something better. He wants to take it slow and rock out the show, but like Hannah Montana, keeping two identities separate eventually comes at a cost. By the end, he stops running from the music and chooses to put others first, even if it means leaving his own life behind.
Leon Kennedy - Resident Evil
Top 5 Artists: Lil Nas X, Taylor Swift, Harry Styles, The 1975, Lana Del Rey
Favourite Genre: Pop
Top Song: Sweet But Psycho by Ava Max
Leon's taste changes depending on which game you are looking at, but I am drawing from the Resident Evil 2 remake version: fresh out of the police academy, discovering himself, and ready to take down zombies with excellent hair. He is into modern pop, alternative rock, and whatever is climbing the charts. He shares playlists with Ada and Claire while on missions, and they have an adorable group chat full of new song recommendations.
Sweet But Psycho is thematically perfect for Leon. He constantly meets attractive people who are moments away from turning into biological monstrosities, and he has to whip out an RPG before things get too romantic. Getting close to someone only for them to explode into a waterfall of bugs is a massive downer, so a little Ava Max in the middle of a firefight probably works wonders. It is the soundtrack of a man who keeps swiping right on danger.
These four Wrapped summaries are absolutely real in my head, and I will not be taking further questions. If your own Spotify Wrapped looks anything like Tom Nook's, please contact me about remodeling my house.